Please read this legal drabble ("Terms of Service", "Terms") carefully, as they contain a great deal of info in your own interest, such as the terms and conditions of which you're allowed to use FurteanTimes.com (the "Service", or "us", "we", "our", "Administration", "Staff", "The Law", "Your Lords And Masters" or any other name we deem fit.) All information, images, text and material (aka, the "Content") on FurteanTimes.com is provided through http://www.furteantimes.com and related websites (our mighty "Domains") free of charge on an "as is" basis.
In using this Service, you (the "User", the "Slave", etc.) agree fully to these Terms of Service and all rules and guidelines defined by thou Holy Terms of Service. The Terms of Service can change at any time without prior notice; and your continued acceptance of your benevolent dictators following these changes will constitute unquestioning acceptance of changes to the Terms of Service. Users have the right to terminate this contract at any time (just make sure we don't break your legs first.)
Disagreement with the current Terms or any future changes to the Terms will be considered termination of the FurteanTimes.com-User contract and you will be free to frolic in them that hills. All changes to the Terms of Service, no matter how small, are considered retroactive and will affect any works currently on the site.
As the User, you agree to take full and complete responsibility for your actions while using the Service, leaving the Administration and Staff free to laugh at you from the executive jacuzzi while you make an ass of yourself. We are in no way responsible for any wilful actions made by any User. An "Action" is defined as the willing transfer of information to and from the FurteanTimes.com Domain(s), and vice-versa too.
If you visited the site unintentionally and/or you don't much agree with these Terms of Service then you must immediately depart the site and return only when you agree with them.
FurteanTimes.com is not responsible for the views, actions and general demeanour of it's Users, nor does these actions represent the Administration, Staff or Users of FurteanTimes.com as a whole. This includes all comments, reports and/or media Content that is submitted to FurteanTimes.com.
We, the almighty Administration, reserve the right, nay, responsibility to:
» Edit and/or remove any and all submissions we deem to not be inline with the Terms of Service. This is inclusive of all Content submitted to FurteanTimes.com;
» Ban an individual or group of Users, to protect the interests of other Users and the Terms of Service;
» To monitor user information and activity, and to investigate possible cases of illegal and illicit activity under regional, national or international law - as well as to protect the interests of Users and the Terms of Service;
» Give any recorded information to recognised legal authorities, so they can tell you you've been a bad boy and go to your room.
Upon t'registration you the User agree that info'mation provided is accurate and complete. You must also ensure t'info'mation is kept accurate and up-to-date throughout yer active membership and yer never-ending gratitude t'FurteanTimes.com Staff blokes.
Failure to keep your personal information up-to-date is a violation of these 'ere Terms o' Service and ain't very good for yourself there. 'At's especially true when it's comes to tha' email address thingmaboodle, which y'all be needing in case ya lose that password o' yours. FurteanTimes.com is not responsible for User info'mation lost due t'inaccurate info'mation, compromised security by those naughty hacker blokes or through t'means o' neglect on t'User's behalf.
Falsification of info'mation provided to FurteanTimes.com may result in t'termination of your membership without warning.
All reports submitted to FurteanTimes.com are considered the copyright of the submitting User unless otherwise said so by the aformentioned User. By submitting reports to FurteanTimes.com you agree all the terms and conditions buried under rock we like to call the Terms of Service.
FurteanTimes.com is not a registered business (It's hardly a registered individual), but when used as a legal term it should be representative of Shaun Hargreaves (aka, Tori Belliachi) - who's the recognised owner, head administrator, coder, designer and tea boy of FurteanTimes.com.
By registering to the Service you agree to respect the rights, interests and opinions (no matter how dumbass) of the Staff and Users of FurteanTimes.com. These rights are enforced by the Staff and Administration to the full extent of the administration panel.
Upon registering you agree to not intentionally harass, disrupt or partake in slanderous goings on against any User or Staff using the Service. As fun as it may be, this is a place of debate and thinking, not mudslinging and throwing crap about like a juvenile monkey. You agree to obey the requests and guidelines laid down by The Law - no matter how absurd - provided they do not lead to another User being harassed, disrupted, or any other thing mentioned above. You have every right to to defend personal interests and opinions, so long as you aren't being a dipshit about it and harassing folks.
If you happen to see any harassment going on, you have the duty - moral or otherwise - to report it to a member of Staff or Administration.
Bigotry is not very nice, and we here at FurteanTimes.com don't like it much either. Bigotry includes - however is far from being limited to - derogatory comments regarding philosophies, race, religion, gender, beliefs, sexuality, philosophies or association.
You, the User, agree to not disrupt the FurteanTimes.com Service or Domain(s). This includes exploiting bugs and errors in the FurteanTimes.com coding. Further to this, you agree to report all bugs to the Administrators and Staff. FurteanTimes.com makes no guarantee that these bugs will actually be fixed, but you can dream.
We the Gods (aka, Administrators and Staff) reserve the right to uphold the Commandments laid forth in these divine Terms of Service in order to protect the interests of those who feed off the land (the Users). This includes, but is as always not limited to, harassment, identity theft, piracy (Yarrr!) and other miscellaneous illegal activities.
FurteanTimes.com is Communist, and believes in the fair and equal treatment of all Users (of course the Administration is MORE equal than other Users.) Reports of Terms of Service violations will be investigated to the full extent of our botheredness. Users are expected to follow the commands of their higher Administration while on the FurteanTimes.com Service, as well as make them a selection of teas and coffees on request. Intellectual property laws still apply and violation may end up with fines or imprisonment (for you, not us). We the Administration will enforce these rules like a duck on heat.
Users in violation of the Terms of Service will undergo painful surgery (edits to your Content) to rectify the violation. This includes, but is not limited to, removal or modification of your vital organs (submissions or user information). Repeated infractions against the Terms of Service may result in complete termination of life (membership).
FurteanTimes.com is pretty darn concerned with keeping your privates private. We do not redistribute your information with anyone - not even Nigerians - unless we said we would in the Terms of Service (which we didn't.) No member of FurteanTimes.com will ask you for your password, nor should you give it to anyone else. It is your own responsibility to keep your account details private; FurteanTimes.com is not responsible for distress or loss of information caused by being stupid.
However we're the merciful type, and we will try to recover lost Content - no guarantees that we can and will though.
FurteanTimes.com reserves the right to collect information regarding your account and person via the willing submittance to our dominant power and through filling in your profile information upon registration and during the period of your membership.
We reserve the right to display information on your profile, as this information is considered as being public. Sensitive information is considered private, and will not be displayed (unless you put it in your profile of course).
We reserve the right to disclose your personal information to third parties if such action is considered necessary. This will only really be in the case where we must conform to legal proceedings to defend the legal rights of our Users or FurteanTimes.com. Which will hopefully never happen, cause if it does then we're buggered.
FurteanTimes.com holds no responsibility over Content while in transmission between FurteanTimes.com airspace (our webspace) and terrorist-ridden Arab countries (your computer).
FurteanTimes.com doesn't need to be online, and by registering and using the site you acknowledge this and any downtime the site may suffer - both through causes of our own and causes not of our own. We reserve the right to modify, suspend or discontinue the Service without notice.
Don't be mean, don't do anything illegal, the Administrators are better than you in every way.